homesick for the holidays

Our friends are often asking us what American food is. We explain that it's not fast food, not just hamburgers or McDonald's. We try to explain what our family eats on regular basis... but neither Joe nor I have a "traditional" American diet when we're feeding ourselves, & our families eat a wide range of foods. We eat a lot of ethnic foods in the States, so what is it that's distinctly American?

We still haven't decided, but a list of foods that I miss (particularly those associated with Christmas & New Year's Day in my family) has been growing in my mind. I'm homesick.

I've had a craving for macaroni & cheese like I've never had in my life. I wanted it homemade, heavy & covered with cheese that has been baked to crispiness. I wanted the leftovers cold, eaten out of a plastic container in the fridge.

My family didn't make homemade macaroni & cheese. We didn't even eat much boxed mac & cheese. But when I was younger, when my grandpa ran the show at family Christmas on my dad's side of the family, there was always a large–LARGE–crock pot of his baked mac & cheese, with onions & so much cheese that even the leftovers were a bit greasy.

I loved the stuff. I wasn't so hot on the Christmas ham, so I'd pile my plate with Grandpa's pasta & baked beans. I'd nibble on it all night, going back for seconds & thirds, then nibbling more while we were packing leftovers to take home.

There aren't many of us on Dad's side of the family, & there are even fewer of us that turn up for the holidays. This meant there were loads of leftovers. Grandpa joked about how much I ate, but he always gave me more than my fair share of mac & cheese to take home. On Christmas day, in place of lunch I'd have a fork at the ready, for nibbling noodles from the fridge throughout the afternoon.

So I made mac & cheese for the first time, using this recipe (from a blog that I really enjoy). It turned out great, even with the random French cheeses we picked for the topping; I think the extra paprika & spoon of cumin I added helped. We paired them with veggie fritters, since I don't know how to make corn fritters & wasn't feeling like corn. (I mashed chickpeas and tossed it with a few slices of yellow bell pepper, an egg, two grated carrots & half of a grated zucchini before frying them in olive oil–& I mean really frying them with some serious oil & heat.)

Yesterday was Thursday, which means it was our night to share dinner with our American friend, Lauren. We've been having themed dinners lately, so we decided to make this week America.

It was the first time I really understood what comfort food was. I bit into the mac & cheese (then warm, gooey brownies washed down with blond beer) & thought of home, of holidays with family & late nights at church, looking at the large nativity scene.

I'll be making a lot more of my family recipes now that I have this oven, & I think that eating food from home & letting the memories come back will help me get through the holidays.

The snow is gorgeous & is also helping my mood–mostly because I have warm socks & boots to walk through it in. I don't know how I would have done it without my new snow(ish) boots...

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